Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
I can now recognize that when my wine bottle reaches a certain point, I probably shouldn't tweet, text or call anyone. RESPONSIBILITY
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Randomize
