Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
I had to explain to the waiter that I'm not the DD because I can't drive, but as the Designated 'Make Sure No One Gets Roofied Or Hit By A Car On The Walk Home'-er, I should still get the free drinks.
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
Randomize
