And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
i was born a porn star she said
dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
mike is out of commission and cannot make breakfast. he's sitting with two frozen waffles on his face & smiling like an idiot.
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
Randomize
