its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.
He's prob getting laid right now and I'm sitting alone in my duct tape shoes.
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
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