so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
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