If I die tonight, wear a V neck to my funeral.
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
did i just pee glitter
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
I think we might need a safe word for this...
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
Randomize
