Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
just got cropdusted by the delivery guy...this was not in my job description.
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
You motherfucker. I just had an MRI with a penny under my boob.
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
What does it say about my expectations if I'm pounding three beers the hour before a date?
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
Thank you, my gorgeous heroine, for being such a total life-saver by giving me rides, forcing me to eat, providing porous absorbant surfaces to bleed on, and everything else you do <3
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