Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
Randomize
