when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
my mom just found my flavored lube in the basement. she gave me a lecture about how "giving head is degrading" omg i feel sooooo bad for my dad
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
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