you guys were way drunker than both of me
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
The only thing the cop asked me is..... "how are you still alive"?
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
Randomize
