I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
You asked the waitress for a vasectomy and handed her a butter knife, like you were ordering something from the menu
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
Hey will pizza rolls help if you accidentally get a diabetic chihuahua drunk?
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
Hey, so I'm not coming into work til Friday. Some guy I've known for about 8 hours just offered me a free vacation to Maui and bought my plane ticket. He's Aussie so I'm 75% sure he won't murder me
It was a blind-side dick pic.
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
Randomize
