Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
probably shouldnt have written that paper while wasted, its starts with once upon a time
i tried to stop you but you kept shouting "two birds with one stone!"
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
You tried to tell me you weren't high while you were eating French onion dip out of the jar with a spoon
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
I just don’t understand what sort of USPS worker wants to take my unitard and sex toys.
Gotta go, there’s a chick at my door that wants to give me head
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
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