Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
Aiming to get laid tonight but if it falls thru I'm either gonna make a mixtape for my sugar daddy or sew a teddy bear for his newborn
Randomize
