Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
I'M SO HIGH I FORGOT HOW TO EAT A STRAWBERRY. A FUCKING STRAWBERRY.
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
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