When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
so, totally just picked up a pack of red bull, and some magnum condoms and the old woman at the register's tone went from "hi blah how are you" to "oh....how YOU DOIN'?" she knew what was up
Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
Randomize
