So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
You can't just leave with hair like that
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Randomize
