omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
not only did u rap a voicemail to me last night.... but it lasted so long that it cut you off so you called back to finish..... never do this again
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
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