and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
