so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
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