There was a fist fight in my basement last night at four in the morning, in case you were wondering
I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
I'm not kidding, he literally jumped in the red panda exhibit. I knew this was gonna be a good birthday.
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
Randomize
