I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
No, I left myself a half eaten cucumber and a beer next to my head, pointed at it and said 'you're breakfast' and then passed out.
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
The 3 year old I'm babysitting is the first guy to tell me he loves me sober in like 2 years
Awkward drunk fist bump with the boss. Not sure if tomorrow will be weird or wonderful.
Ah, drunk me ordered sushi at 3 a.m. for sober me's lunch the next day. EXCELLENT
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
Randomize
