i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
Just successfully went through airport security with shrooms. It's gonna be a fucking awesome new years
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
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