i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
I need to shotgun another beer. Where's the machete?
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
you literally stared at me for three minutes and then said "hey this tequila isn't gonna drink itself, boss"
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
Randomize
