Shark Week may as well be Shark Weed.
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
Drunk enough that you donated $50 to taco bell, because they serve a great purpose.
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
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