I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
I was barred out and drunk as fuck locked out at 3am in my Indian costume. It was literally freezing outside. I laid down on the concrete and made a bonfire with dry leaves. Then proceeded to ask.the.bonfire nicely to "please dont go out". Drunk me went strait up survival mode.
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
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