you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
one word: firstdatebathroomanal
We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
I had to convince you not to write "happy birthday to the first guy who fingered me" on his facebook wall, right above the post from his current girlfriend's mother.
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
Breaking into his house to steal the sheets I'd drunk pissed on before he got home was not how I wanted to be spending spring break
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
YOU HAVE TO STOP TELLING BARTENDERS WE DON'T HAVE MORAL STANDARDS
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
Randomize
