My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
I told you not to have sex with her on my futon
I didnt dude, i swear!
either that or you were eating mayo, which was the second thing i told you not to do on my futon
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
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