TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
I love how my cats smell like pot.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
A stoners worse nightmare? Well packaged snacks. Just took me 5 mins to get a cinnamon roll out of the package. And another 3 mins to properly type this text
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
Randomize