im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
I filled two of the glass ornaments in my mom's bathroom last night with vodka. That way no one sees me drinking on Christmas. Alcoholic or genius? All I know it makes bathroom trips frequent and enjoyable.
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
Randomize
