Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
Today I realized that I've had whole drunk relationships with people. And sober me has and wants no part in it.
he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
You know ure stoned when u start thinking about making a bacon smoothie
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
He had one of those small greek statue penises
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
An there's a little girl across the bar eating Mac n cheese... #1 she won't stop looking at me. Boo bitch I'm drinking alone. #2 I'm about to tackle her ass for that Mac n cheese.
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
Randomize
