And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
Randomize