why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
I'm pretty sure I just had a convo with my hot pockets about how they weren't good enough for the oven.
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
She asked if I wanted to "Mormon Motorboat" her, which I guess is just motor-boating her through her cloths. Turns out I did.
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
We were right in the middle of sex and all of a sudden his kids toy story action figure starts talking "I think the word your searching for is Space Ranger." A literal Buzz kill. It was equally creepy and hilarious.
He literally just laid flat on top of me motionless at one point. It felt less like foreplay and more like he was trying to use me as a flotation device. 0/10
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
Randomize
