But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
I've thrown up twice at work. Just casually, in the mop sink. Then continued to make someone a milkshake. Want some ice cream?
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
Randomize
