Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
Did you put Dave Matthews band on the playlist? It's really hard to funnel when "Crash Into Me" kicks in.
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
I met a guy last night who bought me a book on Amazon at the bar and then we had sex. Boners for books is a thing. Boom.
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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