Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
You should have been there to see the look on her face when I told her that my dog gives better head than her. It was a beautiful symphony of shock, anger, and disbelief.
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
I just don't understand how we smoked the EXACT same thing and I feel fine but Tim's over here serenading his fifth bowl of fruit loops with Elton John's entire discography.
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
I just found a grey hair. On my nipple. Fuck you too, Mother Nature.
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
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