did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
At the gym and this really hot trainer checked me out and was talking to his buddy about his workout. He then says "yeah man, like I'm doing so many reps- what's 7 times 7, 45?"
He was THIS close.
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
How to not get laid: tell him he reminds you of your brother. While having sex. Thanks, vodka.
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
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