Your face is a jimmy john
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
Just so you know, I'm standing in my bra eating cereal. My keys were in the cereal box.
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
Your maid of honor is passed out in a golf cart on the 18th hole.
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Randomize
