Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
in mid sex he pointed out my great gatsby tattoo and we started discussing themes and metaphors from our fave fitzgerald novels
you need to stop fucking English majors
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
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