Bagel with cream cheese. It's blowing my fucking mind.
How high are you right now..
I MICROWAVED IT. SIGNIFICANT IMPROVEMENT.
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
Randomize
