i had a dream the other night i was titty fucking you while you were asleep, then you woke up and didn't care.
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
"Every minute you spend hanging out with David is a minute you could spend meeting someone new, who isn't a huge douche" - Buddha
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
You told your mom that it was your second day sober. I think she believed it until you jumped off the balcony
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
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