I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
Chick stood right next to me in the elevator. Like she had the whole elevator and she stood right next to me. So I farted.
In retrospect pumpkin carving while drinking Patron was a bad idea.
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
I know you won't see this for awhile, but I had to tell somebody, and you're like the only person who won't judge me for having an accidental erotic encounter with General Tso's chicken.
Randomize
