Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
im pretty sure vibrators are the best invention since dinosaur chicken nuggets
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
He showed up at my house drunk with a pizza and said he wanted to lazily finger me while I watched supernatural. Who was I to say no?
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
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