You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
It's not that drunk me is smarter; it's that sober me is secretly playing for the other team.
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
figured you should hear this from me. Your refrigerator door is way broken. I opened it last night when i was drunk and tried to climb the shelves. i got to the one with the mustard.
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
Don't take advice from me. I'm simultaneously shitting and eating cheesecake.
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
Randomize
