Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
The taxi driver was cool until you left. He then started blasting enya and telling me I look like I need another line.
your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
Dave, I love you but you're barking up the wrong lesbian. You sir are the competition. You don't threesome with competition.
When you called me you were telling a hobo that you couldn't spare ten bucks bc that was your beer money. All your words were slurred.
Fuck him.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
Randomize
