How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
Going to dump some dried Xanax powder into some Mac and cheese. Can't think of a better way to avoid tasting it.
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
I am watching the most amazing drunk person ever. Literally such a trooper that you can put anything in front of him he'll drink it. His latest reason for taking another shot was: well whatever. I'm never gonna get married anyway.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
