If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
Woke up this morning on my doorstep in a basket with a branch, a lipstick lightning bolt on my head and a sign that said "the boy who lived." i love you guys.
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
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