Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
Just so you know, a true one night stands ends with a 7 minute blow job after eating a sandwich she made for you while the taxi you called for her comes
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
So last night I learned something new. Whenever I drink beer out of a bottle a random guy buys me another one. It was like as soon as the glass hit my lips every guy in a 20ft radius got a hard on.
Sorry I couldn't make it...got a scrambled voicemail, all I heard was "Bring the dildo"
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
One of the worst parts about living at my parents again is trying to hide how often I'm hungover, just quietly puked in the basement bathroom while my mom got ready for work
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize
