Never eat 3 McGriddles and drink a carton of milk. It's like you're successfully killing self but you're alive.
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
We're so stoned that were both cuddling on the couch and crying over Forest Gump while eating popcorn. She asked me if I'd fuck away the sadness. I think she's serious.
whose parrot is this?
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
My drug dealer is giving me a 15% veterans discount on my weed for nov 11th
That's the best thing I've heard all week.
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
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