trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
Randomize
