well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
Are you kidding me. My sex life has diminshed to having wet dreams about jerking off.
Your parents are going to be so confused in the morning
More like pissed. but ill be sure to explain my pathological fear of terrorists hiding in the bathtub
I wish i could be there for it
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
I was barred out and drunk as fuck locked out at 3am in my Indian costume. It was literally freezing outside. I laid down on the concrete and made a bonfire with dry leaves. Then proceeded to ask.the.bonfire nicely to "please dont go out". Drunk me went strait up survival mode.
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
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