Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
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