Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
If I hear the phrase 'these unprecedented times' one more time I'm putting my foot up someone's ass.
Randomize